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So, good new… I shaved a leg today.*

Guess that means I’m shaking off my Holiday Stupor. Maybe.

How were your holidays? Did you gain 5 pounds?

If you didn’t, you fail. FAIL.

Maybe you Failures don’t know the secrets to success. I’ll give you a few basic pointers to help you along next year, since I’m just awesome like that.

Tip #1: Stay in your Jammies until at least 1230 every day. 130 is better, but you want to ease into these things.

Tip #2: Eat at least 2 holiday treats before and while your coffee is brewing. Then, eat 4 more with your coffee. Didn’t you know? From December 20th-January 3rd breakfast consists of sugar plums (what are those things anyways? Anyone ever had one?).

Tip #3: Watch at least 4 hours of day time TV… no, not through out the holidays. Every. Day. Christmas movies are preferable, but Soap Opera’s will do in a pinch. Eat more holiday treats while you’re at it.

Tip #4: All coffee drinks must be treated with yummy holiday flavorings. Kahlua, Coraline’s, or even Irish Cream flavored Petroleum Products (there’s some of that in my fridge right now… love me some edible petroleum products.)

Tip #5: Cream Cheese, Brie, Camembert. They are your friends, you are supposed to surround yourself with your friends during the holidays…

Tip #6: There is no exercising during the Holidays, none. If you are thinking about it, you haven’t grasped the idea of a HOLIDAY. Instant fail if you even try it. FAIL. (Kim totally failed, by the way.)

Mind you, these are mostly just morning tips… you will have to round out the rest of your day on your own.

How many of you do the whole New Year’s Resolution thing? I don’t believe in them myself. Why make goals you’re not going to keep once a year? I mean, I do it year round, so you do, why try to make January 1st seem special? C’mon, be honest, if you are cool putting off that Big Change until the beginning of the year, chances are you’re going to be cool continuing to put it off for a while longer, non? Now, those of you that said yes to my NYR question, do you want to bet on whether you’ll follow through this year? I’ll collect my winnings at the end of this year.

Now, aren’t you glad I’m back? Yay! Lissy’s back to spread some good feelings and lovely advice around. Mwah!
Hearts and Bubbles,

*Yeah, just one, that’s not a typo.

2 Responses

  1. Kristi

    Yay, I totally passed!!!! Although, I don’t think it was quite 5 lbs (thank god).
    And yes, I am very happy that you are back :)

  2. Maya

    Totally passed! Have missed your wit and sarcasm over the holidays! I too, am happy you’re back!